On my last trip to the library, I picked up the ever-controversial relationship book The Rules. I feel it is important to start this post with a disclaimer: I do not read self-help/relationship books. I am not trying to turn myself into some kind of man trap.
Basically, I've heard about "The Rules", and I was rather curious to see what they were all about. There are 35 rules, but I'll list the first 10, just to give you an idea of the philosophy of a "Rules girl".
- Be a “Creature” Unlike Any Other
- Don't Talk to a Man First (and Don't Ask Him to Dance)
- Don't Stare at Men or Talk Too Much
- Don't Meet Him Halfway or Go Dutch on a Date
- Don't Call Him & Rarely Return His Calls
- Always End Phone Calls and dates First
- Don't Accept a Saturday Night Date after Wednesday.
- Fill Up Your Time before the Date
- How to Act on Dates 1,2, and 3
- How to Act on Dates 4 through Commitment Time
Some of the advice was definitely weird, along the lines of "If you have a bad nose, get a nose job" and "Set a timer so your phone calls with him don't last over five minutes", but some of the other pieces were just common sense. Basically "The Rules" are an extreme, standardized game plan for playing hard to get.
I would like to do an experiment in which I play by "The Rules" and see the results, but alas, I cannot, as I have broken one of the most sacred rules: Don't Live with a Man (or Leave Your Things in His Apartment).
The authors seem pretty adamant that "The Rules" work, but I think that every couple is different and has different needs & preferences. One of the rules is that one should not see a man more than twice a week, and I just don't think that would work for everyone. Another advises women to dump men that do not give them romantic gifts for their birthdays or other holidays. I know for sure that there are some women out there to whom a gourmet coffee maker or fancy light fixture are way more romantic than a tennis bracelet.
If any of you have tried being a "Rules girl", I am absolutely interested in hearing your experience with "The Rules".
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wow...i can't say that i would follow any of these (i live with AND have kids with my boyfriend)! i bet it is a very interesting read, though!
ReplyDeleterules suck. lol I agree with the common sense of it all. The guys I have dated have been all very different, and very similar too.. and I think that you have to adjust to the situation and like you said, the person. Bah! Bah I say to the rules..
ReplyDeleteit should also be noted that I just broke up with someone and am single once agian LOL
LOL. Memories. I have this book on my shelf. Still single . . .
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