2011 Goals

via thxthxthx

I've heard that some people like to have a word to focus their year upon, and this year I would love for my word to be kindness. Do you remember that old Jewel song Hands? It contains a lyric that always gives me pause: "in the end, only kindness matters." Now, I don't know what Jewel meant by "the end". She could have been thinking as simply as "at the end of the day" or as scary as "judgment day" but, to me, the "in the end" just means when you strip away all the stuff that just doesn't count. Years later, when I think of situations in my life, the clothes I was wearing, the boy I was dating, the number of calories I had eaten, those things most assuredly don't matter. The way I treated the people around me? That matters. Kindness matters.

One of my dad's many catch phrases is "be kind". It would always bother me so much when he said that to my brother & me. To me, "be kind" was a lazy way of lecturing, of parenting. Now that I'm older, I see that my dad didn't need {or want} a lecture to get his point across. He needed merely two words..."be kind." As I undertake this project of kindness, I'm sure I'll hear his voice in my mind often; those two simple words that are the best lesson he ever gave me.

A reason I've chosen kindness as my focus this year is that I've been told a lot that I come across as a cold person, not a mean person, just cold. That might have to do with my mantra of "no unnecessary touch" {what can I say, I'm not a hugger} and my blunt attitude. But, I really need to work on that. A moment of discomfort for me might be worth the comfort I can give someone who needs a hug so much that they seek it from my arms. A few years ago, my mom gave me a hug and, as I squirmed away, she said, "I thought you might need it." Finally fully out of her embrace, I told her matter-of-factly that I didn't, in fact, need it. She grabbed me again and whispered, "Maybe I do." You guys, I need to hug my mom more.

I'm an ambitious lady, so of course my 2011 goals include eating right, exercising, reading more, investing wisely, being a good cat mommy, etc. But the area I could really use work in is being kind.

Loosely what this means is...
*showing more affection
*locking up the negatives in my head, until they just go away
*donating my time & money more liberally
*giving Noah more reasons to love me
*smiling more

I'm pretty psyched about 2011.